washing the hearse.

9 Jun
(I enter the church office, chatting with Karen.)
Lindsay: Have you heard if ________ died? [A member who is on hospice and in the hospital]
Karen: No, I haven’t heard.
Lindsay: Oh, I was just wondering. I saw the hearse was outside [of the funeral home].
Karen: Oh, no, that’s not a good sign.
(We hold a five minute conversation about Sharpie markers – extra fine point, retractable, and assorted colors – and then Keith, the custodian, comes in. Chit chatting.)
Karen: Keith, have you heard if _________ died?
Keith: No …
Karen: We were just curious.
Keith: I see Larry was washing the hearse.
Karen: Washing?
Keith: Gail [wife] drove me past about quarter to eight and the ground was wet.
Lindsay and Karen: OH …
Inductive reasoning.
Everyone knows something.
Educated guesses about other people’s business.
Welcome to a small town.

Karaoke anyone?

6 Jun

Instructions : Visit this link. Hit play. Sing along with the lyrics below.


Just sit right back and you’ll hear a sermon, 


A sermon on stewardship 


That started from the Word of God

Within this place so hip. 



Christ was the mighty man in charge, 


The Spirit brave and sure. 


All passengers set sail that day 


For a three week tour, a three week tour. 



Members started getting tired,

The faithful church was tossed, 


If not for the guidance of a fearless God 


Good stewardship would be lost,

good stewardship would be lost. 



We’ll learn together all the ways

Of faithful stewardship 


To care for earth’s 


environment, 


Their resources

and their time, 


God guides them forth 


Together by His love sustained. 


Here for stewardship days. 




So this is the tale of God’s people, 


They’re here for a long, long time, 


They’ll have to take good care of things, 


It’s a law divine. 



The pastors and the lay leaders, 


Will do their very best, 


To teach and guide the others, 


On this great godly quest,

On this great godly quest.



Living and loving others here 


Not an anxious time, you’ll see. 


Like Noah and his family, 


We’re excited as can be.

We’re excited as can be. 



So join us here each week my friends, 


You’re sure to get a smile, 


For God’s beloved castways, 


Here for stewardship days!

Today began three weeks of a stewardship series at Grace which we have named S.O.S. – a summer of stewardship. We’ll be addressing financial stewardship (on which I preached today), time and talents (next week), and care of the environment (the following). I needed to preach a stewardship sermon while on internship and this quickly grew into an elaborate worship planning series including an intense re-writing of the Gilligan’s Island theme song. We sang it this morning at the beginning of worship … and I think the congregation liked it! It was a little rough but it will get better as we sing it again next Sunday and the Sunday following!

gnome dilemma.

4 Jun
Pull up a chair and listen to my gnome dilemma, friends.
Gnome-town has a gnome decorating contest.
(I am so not joking right now.)
The gnome wood cut-outs were available downtown for $3 at Bates Hardware. Buy a gnome and then the idea is that you decorate it uniquely, return it to Bates, and thus enter it in the gnome decorating contest for Riverfest weekend (which is the annual town festival held the last weekend in June).

Buy a gnome I did. Decorate it yet I have not. The only real rule is that there must be a red heart on the sleeve; other than that, the possibilities are endless. The deadline for gnome returns was June 1st … but rumor has it only four of the 70 gnomes purchased were returned on that day. I have it from the organizer’s mouth that I just need to have it in by Riverfest. Game on.
Japanese masking tape? Paper doll outfits with evening wear and swimsuit options? Macaroni noodles?
Any suggestions?
(Speaking of gnomes … I’m giving Friends on dvd a break and revisiting Gilmore Girls on dvd, a show over which my sister and I bonded in the last few years. I’m working my way through the first season and heard this truthful expression from Gilmore’s crazy short neighbor’s mouth : “They kicked a gnome. Right there in the head. I wouldn’t trust these boys. Gnome-kickin’ says a lot about a man’s character.”)

from tiny seeds –

4 Jun

a prayer service and psalm 100.

1 Jun

A psalm. For giving thanks.

1 Shout for joy to the LORD, all the earth.

2 Worship the LORD with gladness;
come before him with joyful songs.

3 Know that the LORD is God.
It is he who made us, and we are his;
we are his people, the sheep of his pasture.

4 Enter his gates with thanksgiving
and his courts with praise;
give thanks to him and praise his name.

5 For the LORD is good and his love endures forever;
his faithfulness continues through all generations.

I read this psalm today at a funeral. It’s part of my role in funerals – I’m the lesson reader. I looked the lessons up before the funeral, just to read through them once, and when I turned to this psalm and began reading, I made an audible “aw.” I like this psalm as a funeral text. A lot. It’s not always the easiest to proclaim and praise God following a sudden death of someone we love but the promise contained within the psalm is central to our reliance and strength in God amidst such suffering. I like-y.

It was Dorothy’s funeral. Dorothy who I was just supposed to visit last Thursday only to find out she had been flown to the hospital in a nearby large city following a heart attack. Dorothy who was the very first to show up the intern meet-and-greet when I first arrived in September. Dorothy who was half of the “cozy couple.”

I led the prayer service for Dorothy last night at the funeral home. As a part of the prayer service, there is a time of sharing. With some services, the sharing will last twenty minutes – twenty minutes of friends and families sharing stories and memories of the one who has passed away. Some services, no one speaks. When no one stands to share, it’s a little awkward … and I thought that was where last night’s service was going.

Then Jake marched forward and stood in front of the gathered group. Jake was one of my third graders when teaching Wednesday release time. A boy with a sweet heart and great sense of humor. Jake told of how Dorothy would give him candy in church. She would pull pieces out of her purse and hand them to the children sitting around her. He told of how, at Halloween, his friends would go to her house and get little pieces of candy but when he stopped by, he would get a Mountain Dew and a big Butterfinger. Then he told of how Dorothy was like another grandma to him and he started to cry a bit.

So then I started to tear up. I’m a social crier. If other people around me are crying, I’ll cry and can’t help it. I teared up because Jake was hurting at the death of his “third grandma.” (Children hurting and in emotional pain make Lindsay a puddle.) I also teared up in thanksgiving of Dorothy and the effect she had on Jake. Dorothy didn’t need to carry candy around with her to give to kids in church. Dorothy didn’t need to give Jake a big candy bar or take an interest in his life. But she did and look at the relationship that grew between her and a ten year old boy.

Further proof that the smallest of actions or the simplest words of kindness can make a difference and foster a relationship.

Go do that today.

graduation celebrations.

31 May
This past Sunday marked the first of our summer worship schedule at Grace, meaning now just one service at 9am. Kendall was gone so it was all me – solo. I led worship, preached, schmoozed at coffee hour and then at 11am, hit the road for St.Paul. It was the day of Luther Seminary’s 141st commencement ceremony and I was super excited to make the trek and celebrate with a few graduating friends!
The ceremony is always held at Central Lutheran Church in downtown Minneapolis, one of the largest, most beautiful Lutheran churches. I met up with my pal, James, and we found our spots in the balcony to cheer on the graduates. This year there were about 45 graduates with two-year master degrees and about 75 graduates with master of divinity degrees (the degree which I seek and will receive next year at graduation – eek!).
It was my dapper friend, Justin, who invited me to make the journey to graduation. Justin and I met last year when he moved into the room next to mine in the dorms on campus. I’ve been knocking on his door, bothering him ever since and he politely tolerates my friendship. I couldn’t help but tell him so many times that day how proud I am of him! My dear friend, Kate, (below in the white dress and master’s hood) also crossed the stage and received her master of divinity degree! Kate was one of my very first friends at seminary; we were set-up by a high school friend of mine who went to college with Kate. She will be serving a parish in the U.P. of Michigan; the specific location of the lucky congregation to have her as their pastor is still to be determined.
After the ceremony, James and I joined Justin and his family (who flew in from Pennsylvania for the occasion) in celebrating the day. We ate a fancy schmancy dinner downtown, where I may have accidently thrown expensive French cheese on the floor. My reaction as Justin picked the cheese up : giggles. Fancy places make me giggle; the hick in me feels out of place and uncomfortable. The cheese was still good; the five second rule also applies to fancy food.
Later that evening, we headed out to further celebrate Justin’s graduation. We visited The Happy Gnome in St.Paul (naturally) and then, after 45 minutes of driving around looking for a respectable eating establishment that was open, landed at Pizza Luce where the three of us quickly devoured a baked potato pizza. Back to the dorms for a bed time story and incessant laughing before bed.
Wait. Bed? We heard the birds begin to chirp at 4am and then noticed when the sky started to get lighter at 6am. We scored a good 2.5 hours of sleep before heading to IKEA for brunch/lunch/celebratory cake and then, sadly, my trip to the cities needed to come to a close; I headed back to Dawson after a most fulfilling and exciting night in St.Paul catching up with two of my most favorite friends.

And how does one drive three hours by oneself on two and a half hours of sleep?
Thank you, Caribou.
Thank you, espresso.

Jesus?

29 May

Remember this guy that resides in my office?
He’s pretty cool. Fun office mate. Sometimes I would give him a high five on my way out the door. You know, just a way to say, “Hey, thanks for being here, Jesus” or “Hey, Jesus, you’re pretty boss.”
Last Wednesday night he went missing. Jesus was no where to be found. It was the empty tomb all over again and I was a Mary.
After we had cleaned up from of Women of Grace event, it was nearing 9pm. Karen and I then spent the next half hour looking for Jesus, certain that someone had just moved him but concerned that it might have been the high school choir kids who were there that night. We would feel better going home if we knew where Jesus was.
We checked all the obvious places – Tammy’s office. Nope. Emily’s office. Nope. Kendall’s bathroom. Nope. Where was Jesus?
Jesus has been known to be moved every once in a while, to surprise a staff member or bring comfort. (Really, the former more than the latter. Comfort? This Jesus tends to scare the bejesus* out of me if he moves.) But Karen and I looked everywhere and found the statue of our Lord no where.
We find out the next day that Jesus had ascended. To the cemetery. The original intent of the Jesus statue was that he be placed in the cemetery but after the statue had hung out in the intern’s office for more than two years, it was a surprise when it actually happened.
And so suddenly. I didn’t have a chance to say goodbye to my faithful office mate. As Kendall told me in pastoral-care-via-text-message, “The Lord works in mysterious ways.” I walked to the cemetery today to visit my buddy. He looks good, perched and preaching from a rock in the middle of a round-a-bout. It is nice to know that he hasn’t gone too far and I can still visit him when I feel so moved to spend time in the cemetery.
* bejesus : an exclamation traditionally attributed to the Irish, used to express surprise or for emphasis. they were forty minutes late, cocky as bejesus (the example used in my apple dictionary).

wilted.

27 May

I feel a bit wilted today, like the flower I forgot to water.
First thing. I’m tired as all get-out. It has been a l.o.n.g. week of hours at work. A week of late nights. Lots of preparation for the Women of Grace event and other large upcoming projects that have required my attention and seemingly snuck up on me. Visits. Preaching on Sunday. Please don’t hear this as complaining – I’m not – I loved (nearly) every minute of my work this week – but I think I’m trying to prove to myself that I have reason to be tired. This week has flown by so quickly because I’ve been so busy and slept so little; if this is any indication of the rest of the summer, my last three months here will feel like a week and a half.
Second thing. The next intern, who will arrive in September after I leave in August, came to visit yesterday. He’s great; I think he will be a great addition to Grace and will fit in well. But my emotions were on edge as he came to see where he would be and I began to understand what it will feel like to leave. August 22/29-ish will be a sad day indeed. (I thought my last Sunday would probably be Aug. 22nd; my coworkers have decided to change that date to the 29th. Can’t say I protested too much.)
Third thing. I’m working through the emotions of being a pastor and today they seem to be quite heavy with little outlet. Being a pastor is built on relationships; you’re invited into people’s lives to share in their joys and their struggles. I’ve been in Dawson for nine months now; I’ve built relationships. They are short-term relationships, not even a year or two long yet, but I still feel involved and invited in. When a woman I have come to know through quilting mornings at church and home visits is in the hospital for the week and pretty darn sick, it hits me. When I hear that the woman I had planned on visiting this morning for a communion visit was transported to a near-by large city because she had a heart attack, my heart sinks. Later, when doing visits at the hospital, I meet a member of Grace for the first time; she is very best friends with the woman who had the heart attack and begins to cry at the thought of her friend fighting for her life. I’m invited in to share with people in their sickness and in their pain. I do my best to be the non-anxious-listening-presence that CPE taught me to be … but it still makes me cry. I hold their hand as we pray together and I empathize with their sadness, anger, and grief. I can’t leave my work at the office; the emotions, the prayers, the relationships are with me even when I come home at night.
But these relationships are the key. Relationships with people (and, well, sharing the promise of relationship with Christ) are the reason I want to be a pastor. Relationships are why it will be so difficult to leave Grace in three short months. I will have only been here for one year; I can’t imagine what it will be like to leave a church after a three year, ten, or fifteen year call. I am so thankful for the relationships in my life; the short-term and the long-term, the best friends and the acquaintances. I am thankful for the relationships that I have gained as a pastor, being invited into people’s lives, to celebrate with them the joys and to be near them in times of sorrow.
I don’t feel so entirely wilted anymore. (Writing is my therapy when I live alone.) The flowers don’t either. I watered them when I got home and the daisies have now sprung back to life. I don’t have enough energy to spring back to life quite like that but I will curl up on the couch and be in bed by 10.

bag ladies.

26 May
It was a Women of Grace night at church tonight. Women of Grace events fall under my coworker Emily’s jurisdiction and they’re held three times a year. Typically, an event like this brings in a speaker; in my time at Grace, there have been two other Women of Grace nights – Emily’s sister, who is a professor at Luther Seminary, and another woman with a darling southern accent were the speakers. It came time for this night and no speakers were to be found. They declined. Or were busy. We were stuck.
Emily and I brainstormed, searched the web, and finally landed upon this as the title of this night’s event for which WE became the speakers: What’s in your purse? What we carry with us as Christian women.
Does it sound lame? Maybe a bit corny? It was every bit corny, maybe a tad lame at parts but still completely awesome. We started with a purse party game and a clip from Friends (where Phoebe pulls a shoe, an egg, and a live goldfish from her purse). From there, we moved into our program – how the things we carry around in our purse can help us remember to live Christian lives. We scored a few laughs, especially when Emily pulled her shake-weight from the bottom of her purse.
After the program, we sewed! Each woman either sewed or watched someone else sew together for them a small bag to take home. Preparation for the sewing occupied my last few days, along with Karen, the expert sewer on staff. We cut yards and yards of fabric, cut and pinned webbing for handles and then serged the outer edges of all pieces. Phew. (Mom: I learned how to use a serger! Prior to this week, I didn’t even know what a serger was … scary looking machine.)

It was something different but I think the women who attended enjoyed the program. It was a lot of work and made for some crazy days this week but it was fun. Emily and I brought in all of our purses as props; we wore them around as we welcomed people. I carried my gnomes in mine; Emily carried her entire medicine cabinet and an emergency heat blanket. Crazy bag ladies. We’re thinking about taking our program on the road to other churches – book us?

hints of happy (cont’d).

22 May
Hint #11 : Spinach salads with my new blackberry ginger balsamic vinegar.
Hint #12 : Polka dots.
Hint #13 : College campuses. An overnight ninth grade confirmation retreat to Gustavus last Tuesday night made me remember and miss my years at Luther College. College = awesome.
Hint #14 : A new-to-me book, left in my mailbox at work. I used “choose your own adventure” books as a sermon illustration during Lent; someone was listening and remembered!
Hint #15 : The butter-and-saltine challenge was completed last Tuesday. I made homemade Twix bars which, in theory, look and sound delicious. They are meant to be made with whole crackers, not crushed ones, so my bars … kinda … fell … apart. The staff still seemed to appreciate the taste of them and made a game out of matching the bottom parts to a top part as they fell apart once cut. “It’s like a puzzle!”
Hint #16 : A vase of fresh-cut flowers outside my office door once again.
Hint #17 : Dinner with C and his family for “fishy meatballs;” my first experience with salmon loaf. Verdict: pretty darn good. Dinner followed by a game of tag in the basement.
Hint #18 : I purchased this poster. I love the boldness of the color along with the truth in the statement. I’ll hang it in my apartment next year, knowing my roommate will totally agree. Right, Jeanette?
Hint #19 : My bestest friend, Adam, has decided on and been accepted to Luther Seminary beginning this fall! woot! I am so excited to spend time on campus with him as a fellow student and to take a letterpress class with his new bride!
Hint #20 :
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