there's no place like gnome.

I agree with each and every one of these which were posted on a blog I regularly follow —

Ten Important Things I’ve Learned About Blogging

In style with #10, I love you.  Thanks for reading my blog.
(insert high five or hug depending upon our real-world relationship)

I’m sorry. I was wrong about you. I made a quick judgement call and I now realize I was wrong.

It’s not always easy to admit that you’re wrong. You know this from your spat with Pork Chops. Sometimes we make decisions irrationally and too instantly – without doing further research or realizing that one bad experience shouldn’t make one never want to try something again (except with sky diving).

I met you, Ham Balls, on an off day. You were slimy and swimming in a mysterious pineapple sauce; I was not impressed. But last night I learned that you’re different than I thought. That my first impression was wrong. That you actually can be quite tasty, firm, and pleasing to the stomach. For not realizing that sooner, I’m sorry.

I enjoy you. Really, I do. I hope to have further encounters; perhaps I could even share you with others who have not yet had the pleasure of pig in ball form. I only regret we didn’t begin our relationship sooner.

Drooling,

Lindsay S.

[A shout-out and thank you to Mary O. & Co. (including husband, Sam, who likes to keep Snickers in his fanny pack) who saw an intern pastor in need – in need of a positive ham ball experience. This intern pastor had a grand night of ham balls, peach pie, and great company in her last week in ham ball country. Perfect.]

I’ve been at the care center/assisted living facility in Dawson a fair bit in the past week. I led communion services at both places last Friday and then again had a service at the care center on Sunday morning after regular worship at Grace. It’s always humorous to overhear certain comments from the residents. They either have no idea who you are and thus say these things, or they may think you’re out of earshot when really, you’ve only taken five steps away.

Instance A: We’re preparing for the Friday afternoon communion service at the care center. I’m setting up, getting organized, when I hear a man behind me ask, “Where’s the minister?” Another man answers him, “She’s right there.” First man pauses and then says, “Oh. I was expecting a man.” Of course you were. And probably someone who doesn’t look 16, the age many people tell me they think I am.

Instance B: I have the service at the care center and then I walk the fifty feet to the assisted living facility for the same service once again. After that service, I typically stay for a short lunch before needing to return to the care center to visit/give communion to those who did not attend the earlier service. I stayed for lunch – coffee and bars – and then had to take my leave. I said goodbye to the ladies and began to walk away to gather my things. I was not five steps away when they started to talk about me. I just smirk to myself, thinking, really, ladies? Do you think I can’t hear you? They were all good things so this is not at all a complaint but rather just a humorous episode in my book. (“She’s a good pastor,” “A church will be lucky to have her,” “She’s a sweetheart.” Aww. Ego boost! [which I really don’t need – my head is large enough] I love the assisted living ladies.)

Instance C: This is not an instance of overhearing exactly, but rather something told directly to me. On Sunday, as I mentioned, I was at the care center again to lead the Sunday service. I’ll often announce the hymns we are singing and then walk around the room, helping residents turn pages and find the hymn in their spiral-bound hymnals. I helped one resident over and again, and one of the last times I turned pages for her, she said, in her raspy voice, “Thank you. You’re special.” That’s what my mom always told me. For cute.

I’d heard rumors that this happens.

I should be prepared for it to appear on my desk someday.

I waited.

And waited.

And finally it appeared … on Karen’s desk.

A big one. A big bat. From the sanctuary.

Keith gets a mighty good laugh out of others’ squeamishness in regards to the creature-in-a-container.

I’m holding out for bat ashes in the mail next year. Then I’ll know I was truly loved.

… big projects on the horizon at church. A day camp? Yes, please! Confirmation retreat? Great! Completely owning Sunday worship for the month of August? Bring it! A city-wide scavenger hunt to create? Sweet! Twenty page approval essay for the candidacy process due to the seminary by Sept. 1? Ugh.

… I will have visitors in the form of grandparents and aunts for the next TWO weekends! I’m looking forward to family.

… new sewing projects. Always good.

… a care center conversation :

Me: Would you like a ride to lunch, M.?

M: That would be lovely. (looks at me more closely) That’s an interesting sweater you have on.

Me: It’s kinda a summer sweater. (it’s cropped with short sleeves. a cardigan, of course.) There’s not much to it.

M: (almost disapprovingly) I noticed.

… I’m training for a 10k run. Hilarious, right? Well, a schedule is what I need to stay on track with getting to the gym and this is helping! The 10k is actually imaginary; people ask me when it is and I say it isn’t. I’m not signed up for one but it’s still good motivation. I’m two weeks in and still on schedule. We’ll see how the 3.5 mile run this weekend treats me with calves that hate me right now.

… I’m excited to be blogging from a new location next week. Stay tuned for my change of venue and I’ll introduce you to my roommate-for-the-week!

I love fonts. (More than I love lamp.) The BBC has an article regarding the particular importance of choosing fonts. Amen. My favorite place to download new fonts? The font squirrel. (Because who doesn’t associate the bushy-tailed creatures with typography?) To quote the BBC article —

A few commercial products the gnomes and I are enjoying of late. Here are my current endorsements –

POPchips. Not sold yet in smaller towns (er, Dawson?), I stock up on a few bags of these when I’m at a Target. LOVE these and think they’re probably better than popcorn during a movie.

Starbucks has a special summer blend of coffee beans which make PERFECT iced coffees. I typically don’t buy into such ploys about the different types of beans/roasting/etc. that make this one better than the other for this reason or the next but I believe in this coffee. Seriously. Brew it strong. Ice it down. Add a little chocolate almond milk. A little sugar-free flavoring syrup (currently hazelnut). Perfection.

I credit cranberry apple Crystal Light as the drink that has helped me move past my daily Diet Coke addiction. I drink about a pitcher of this a day. Nummy.

Sara got me hooked on The Big Bang Theory. Season two was ordered used on Amazon and is shipping to me as I write. I wait patiently for more Sheldon.