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vacation.

22 Oct
I feel like I needed to come back to Austin to rest up.  From vacation.  It was a busy one.
Vacation got a late start.  Originally, I was going to drive home to Wisconsin on Saturday morning but then MasterChef excitement entered the equation.  I was going to go home Saturday night but then MasterChef excitement continued through Monday.  [which meant church at ROG went on Sunday morning as Mabel and I hid in the parsonage, pretending we weren’t there.]  It was late Monday night when I finally stepped foot at my mom’s on Aarback Road and it was for the last time.
Going home meant staying at this home [where my family has been since I was 16] for the last time.  My mom has sold the house and is in the process of building another.  The current home must be moved out of by mid-November.  The future home will not be done until mid-December.  My mom is moving into my grandparent’s for the month of limbo and that means I am homeless when I drive home for thanksgiving.  [There’s a couch out there somewhere with my name on it.]
It was super crazy and weird to stay for the last time in this house.  I’ve moved enough in my life to not be super attached to locations or houses, but this place was still home for the last 12 years.  Super weird.  But seeing the skeleton of the new house come together was exciting too.  And seeing my mom excited about it makes me excited.  All will be well.
So there was that.  And there was hurriedly finishing a baby quilt for Banana, Kim, as I went to her baby shower on Saturday before driving back to MN.  [I was in such a rush to finish it and wrap it for the shower that I forgot to take a picture of it!  It was chevron stripe-y in cream, brown, red, green, blue, and polka dots.  Super cute, if-I-don’t-say-so-myself.]  There was a movie night with Aunt Kari and cousin Molly.  We had family over one evening for dinner since my brothers from Appleton and Alaska were home too.  Alaska brother taught us a new card game – Sheepshead.  Super complicated and fun.  Visiting all sorts of family and friends and beginning to reread Harry Potter rounded out the all-too-fast week.
We didn’t see this.  Pitch Perfect was the movie of choice.

Look at this little man with huge eyes!  A banana baby.

Molly and I colored with cousins Logan and Kennedy.  We created a combination sheep and buddy.  [A compromise made because Lindsay can’t make sheep faces.]

Mabes.

Baby shower for Kim and Mike!  As indicated by glass in bottom left corner, there was much wine at said shower.

Dancing Bananas.

4 Dec
It’s just a fruit.
And it’s a little ridiculous to think that they can dance.
The Dancing Bananas are facing trials and tribulations by the bushel basket these days.
Surgeries. 
Child custody.
Job uncertainty.
Fertility wonderings.
Questions about the future.
Potential moves cross country.
Aggressive cancer in a father-in-law.
Searching for answers to medical conditions.
It’s a lot.  So much.  The emails are nearly daily at this point with communication, support, and funny stories in the midst of it all.  The seven of us currently live in five different states and it’s been nearly ten years since we graduated from high school.
I’m not completely sure what holds us together and so tightly.  Maybe it’s the fact that you don’t often find bananas that dance.  We’re rare and find comfort in being odd together.  Or that we love each other and have been friends for over twenty years.
The bananas of the world are meant to unite, jump, dance, and go.  And so we do, along with support, hug, and love.  Early morning phone calls, cake pop care packages, and anything more.  I love my Dancing Bananas.

a church home of many.

30 Oct
After worship this morning, I was Stillwater-bound.  My small group of ninth graders at Trinity were being confirmed and I was to be a part of it as their leader.  I stepped in to be the small group leader to four ladies in their last year of confirmation and it was only in those eight months that we meant on Wednesday nights.  They are gifted, amazing, and super polite gals.  It was fun to see them again and play a part in this affirmation of baptism.
One of my small group gals, Emma, was chosen to share her faith statement.  Yup.  I teared up.
One of the best parts of attending the service was to catch up the staff members with whom I worked for two and a half years.  Pastor Dan – the senior pastor – is ever the kind man with so many words of wisdom; it comforted me to speak with him oh-so-briefly about first call as he compared it to his in southwest Minnesota.  Musician Phil always greets me with a hug.  Youth guy, Cory, sat next to me and we cracked jokes the whole way through; I caught up with his very pregnant wife and stood in the parking lot talking about church, life, and cakepops. 
The years I spent at Trinity were invaluable to my journey in ministry.  It’s fun to return, see friends, and think about the person I was and how I’ve grown since then.  It’s one of my church homes and today, it was fun to go home even if ever so briefly.

dawn and mr.darcy.

24 Oct
The corn in my backyard was harvested yesterday evening.  With the corn gone, my morning view has improved.  I woke up to this scene this morning:

Which couldn’t help but remind me of this scene from Pride & Prejudice.  I kept waiting for my Mr.Darcy to walk across the field towards me.  [No luck.]  As gal pal, Sara, commented on my facebook post about the photo [profanity warning]: … did your secret love interest’s bitchy aunt just come and try to forbid you from accepting a marriage proposal?  Is that why you were up that early and wandering through a foggy field?  [if you know the movie as well as Sara and I – or really just at all – that should make perfect sense]

one more.

25 Sep
Wedding number four of the summer.

I drove home on Friday afternoon [after frantically trying to find a nearby place to change my oil.  a man named peter helped me out.  he was cute.] with the opportunity to stop for lunch with Cassie in LaCrosse.   Rehearsal happened and a fun dinner at the Great Dane followed.  Cousin Mike and Jennie were getting married – it was just crazy to realize that it was finally here.  Mike is a year younger than I [the same age as my brother Ben] and we all grew up together, he and his brother, Kyle, just across the corn field.
The wedding on Saturday was short and sweet, just as the couple wanted.  And actually, it worked out pretty swift since the ceremony was outside and it was a wee bit chilly at 5pm!  I was able to stay for dinner and cake and then I had to take my leave for Minnesota.  It was cool to be in the same place – the same state – as all my siblings and it was also pretty cool that I was able to catch up with a lot of cousins.
One of the highlights of the weekend for me – besides, you know, the actual wedding celebration – was Kyle’s toast as best man and brother of the groom.  Kyle did an awesome job, pinpointing the most awesome things about Mike.  Like how Mike can get really angry if you take a piece of his gum-a-flouge [a gum meant to mask one’s breath while hunting].  Leave it to Mike to have such a thing and leave it to him to get bent out of shape if you take a piece without asking.  Great story.  Great story.  Kyle’s funny.  [as the waitress at the Great Dane took to saying as Kyle teased her.  “You’re funny,” she said … sarcastically?]

Banana wedding!

18 Sep
Lynn baby, one of my utmost best friends from high school and from all time, was married yesterday.  She was married to another awesome, wonderful friend from high school, Mr. Kyle.  I drove home on Friday to attend rehearsal and dinner [I assisted and preached at the ceremony.] and drove back to MN Saturday night [with arrival at the parsonage a la 1:30am.]  It was so incredibly worth the trip.  I’d do it again anytime.
Lynn looked absolutely stunning.  As her dad walked her down the aisle, I had to fight back tears.  This couple is so wonderfully in love.  *sigh*  I’m so happy for them.
The Bananas, one short of a full bunch.  We missed you, Jenni!

Right before the beginning of the ceremony, Kyle and I waited downstairs to walk to the front of the church.  In effort to calm nerves [both of ours], Kyle made a crack, “At least you know there won’t be any strange dogs who show up at this wedding!”  [In reference to Krissy and Matt’s wedding in August.]  I laughed.  And then said I could make no promises.  He gave me a quizzical look, confused.  It was great.
Because the banana dog played a role in the message I gave.  [Remember the banana dog from way back when?  This was the second time he was a part of a sermon I preached.]  The text chosen was John 15:9-17; find my message below if you care to read.
The ceremony was perfect.  Lynn was beautiful and Kyle was giddy.  A few Bananas and parents went out for drinks before heading to the place of reception for dinner.  A buffet, photo book, picture slideshow, and lots of hugs … and then I had to tear myself away.  I had to drive back to MN.  boo.  So many congratulations to Mr. and Mrs. Lynn and Kyle – I love you both.

some of my favorite guys trying out the photo booth, complete with props.
…
Let’s start at the beginning.  Picture Lynn, a young girl with long thick brown hair and eyeglasses with a small butterfly on the frame above one eye.  This is the Lynn I first knew.  Friends for many, many years, we’ve been through everything together.  We dressed up together – I was a giant bunny and you were a penguin and a flamingo.  We rode skateboards down your driveway and camped in your backyard.  In the past years, though we often haven’t even lived in the same state, Lynn is always a friend I know I can call at any time and we’ll find things to talk about for hours.  A friend full of hope and love and genuineness.
I don’t know as much about Kyle from the younger years.  A Yahara kid by location, it wasn’t until high school in Mr.Papendieck’s AP US History class that Kyle and I began to know each other.  Instead of grades, we would compare the smiley faces that Mr.P put on our papers.  I know Kyle to be a person who stands by a friend in good times and bad, willing to help in any way.  As phrased by another one of Kyle’s friends, he’s a people magnet, consistently making new friends and connecting to new people.
We know that you’re awesome friends to those in your life.  I feel lucky to call both of you friends, and friends from so many years ago and still.  You care beyond measure and treasure relationships within your lives.  What’s even more awesome is that’s how you began your journey to this time and place of wedding vows and rings.  You first were friends to one another.  In Edgerton and in Madison, in between classes and football games, you were first friends.  From that strong base of friendship, you built this relationship that we now celebrate.  The relationship that leads you to become husband and wife today. 
The reading that you chose from the gospel of John speaks deeply of friendship.  These words are spoken by Jesus to his disciples; words that will guide them after Christ has been crucified.  Within these words Jesus commands his disciples – his closest friends – to love one another as he has loved them.   He tells them that there is no greater love than to lay down one’s life for one’s friends.   We’re commanded to love each other with a Christ-like love and to be a friend in all times, through tragedy and happiness.  Christ commands his disciples – and us – to live a life of love.  You, Lynn and Kyle, practice this each day.  You give your time, your love, and yourselves to those in your life. 
At the center of your life together are your friends and families.  This is evident in all of the people who have gathered here to celebrate this day and your relationship with each other.  To find a space large enough to hold all the people you care about and who care for you would be impossible.  I’m pretty sure that’s why Lynn told Kyle that he wasn’t allowed to make any new friends until after the wedding.  Is that right?
As you have chosen each other and make promises to each other today and every day following, you together go into the world to bear fruit.  Jesus chose the disciples to go and bear fruit, fruit that will last.  That’s what it says in the gospel ready – to bear fruit.  That sounds a bit weird – not necessarily something that we would say today.  It’s not like Lynn leaves for work in the morning and Kyle says goodbye by saying, “Bear good fruit today, honey.”  What does it mean to bear fruit?
I think we should ask Lynn.  Lynn knows all about fruit.  I don’t think there is any kind of fruit Lynn doesn’t like.  She can peel an apple in one spiral of apple skin.  Lynn is known as an excellent strawberry picker and apple crisp baker and banana dog sender.   I’ll say that again – Lynn is an excellent strawberry picker, apple crisp baker, and banana dog sender.  Lynn sent this to me in the mail once.  It’s a banana dog.  Another example of what a great friend she is – because she mails things like this.  Because why not, right?
This may not be the exact kind of fruit that Jesus meant to bear – it’s likely he was not referring to this banana dog or the matching one that lives with Lynn and Kyle.   To bear fruit is not Biblical code to send animals made of fruit.  But Webster here might help us understand what exactly it does mean.
Webster was chosen for me by Lynn and given as a gift.  As Jesus chose the disciples to go out and bear fruit, you have chosen each other.  That in itself is a gift.  Kyle, you chose Lynn, and Lynn, you chose Kyle to build your life with.  Today you will vow to love each other for your entire lives.  In that life together, go out and bear fruit.  Bear fruit that will last. 
Fruit that will not last are things like selfishness, holding grudges, and envy.  The actions that kill, hurt, and prevent a love from growing. 
Rather to bear fruit that will last is to be a friend to each other.  To bear fruit in your relationship is to do the things that would help a strawberry plant or orange tree grow.  Care for each other.  Love each other with attention and protection.  As weeds creep up or a worm comes along – whatever that may be in our actual lives – be there for the other.  Work together.  Nourish your relationship with the things you need and support each other as you grow.  It may look like listening more than you speak.  Webster is great at listening.  To bear good fruit means compromise.  Apologizing and forgiving.  Ultimately, to bear fruit is to share the love that Christ commands us to share, the love that we’re first given by the God who created us. 
You vow today to put the other before yourself, to care for the other with a love that is patient and kind.   A love that is not envious, boastful, arrogant or rude.  A love that bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, and endures all things.  Be a friend to each other.  Go out together, hand in hand, and bear good fruit to the world. 
Those of us here call you friends, love you deeply, and cannot wait to see the fruit that you bear as you love and life you lead together.  May God bless your relationship and always be a source of love in your lives.  Amen.

overwhelmed.

29 Aug
I am feeling completely overwhelmed.  Overwhelmed to tears.  I’ll cry at the drop of a hat or the start of a certain song on the radio.   I’ve been feeling such for the last couple days.  I realize that writing on my blog is not going to help that overwhelmed feeling disappear but it might make me feel the tiniest bit better simply to write.  Writing for me is therapeutic like that.  
The overwhelmy-ness [new word?] stems from lots of different places.  From the stress of moving, the long to-do list, and the uncertainty of what my life will be like in the next month … in the next year.  From the thought of how crazy September will be, needing to rely on other people to help me [self-admitted control freak], and sneezing six times.  [literally, six times.  just now.  last time that happened, I popped a blood vessel in my eye.  true story.]  I don’t even know where to begin in this packing bit.  I’m still in this crazy place of unpacking from previous trips and needing to clean and repack and that makes the spacial and strategic part of my brain hurt.  [And not only repack, but pack in stages, knowing that all of my things will not be moved at once but over the course of a month.]  I suppose there is a time when I just simply have to begin.  I feel stress in certain relationships within my life and struggle to know where I stand in others.  I’m tired and have not been eating my vegetables.  
It seems the best way for me to combat this overwhelmed sense in life is to simply ignore everything that needs to be done.    This morning I visited with Grandma, returned books to the library [okay, that was on the to-do list] and checked out a few movies [watching movies is not on the to-do list].  I picked up Molly Bea and we set off for a bit of shopping.  Now sure, there were things I needed.  [a toaster.  batting for a sewing project.  conditioner.]  I could have done the trip in a little over an hour if I was strategic about it.  
Instead of being strategic, I was with Molly.  We were gone for close to four hours, spending far too much time in Target and having far too much fun in Jimmy John’s while reading 20,001 Baby Names.  
We carried this cloud of batting to the cut counter.  
I’d have had it no other way.  After stopping at the grocery store [for vegetables] and to chat with my gracious mover-man [a brother of my best friends from high school – he’s being entirely selfless and awesome to me by moving my furniture], I figure I was gone for six hours easy.  Now I’m home and writing this.  One of these days I’m going to need to address this thing called packing.  And some minor car repair.  And packages that need sending.  And a few phone calls and financial bits.  
I think I might take a nap.

So.

28 Aug
I arrived home after my Minnesota adventures and have since proceeded to do nothing on my to-do list.
Oh, the list is long, friends.  Long.
Lots to do in the next week before I move.
I move in one week.  One week.
… … … … …
ONE WEEK!
I’ve watched Friends and Good Will Hunting.  Went to church.  Had a noon-day meal with extended family.  Napped.  Skyped with the sis.  Began creating a this-is-what-driving-to-alaska-looks-like video.  Responded to long-neglected emails.  Slept.  Spent hours on Pinterest.  [I created a new autumn board; I can’t wait for cooler temps and pumpkin everything.]
And I think that’s it.
So … … …

home.

25 Aug
This word is on the brain.  Home.
According to my handy dandy dictionary [yeah.  I’m going to the dictionary.  *cliche*], a home is the place where one lives permanently.  I’m going to have to disagree, mr. dictionary man.  [I’m picking a fight so I’ll make the dictionary male.]  I’ve felt lately like I have more than just one home.  It’s not about permanent residence but about a lot more.
I spent last night in Dawson and when I return to this small southwestern Minnesota town, it feels like I’m going home.  The downtown is familiar, the air is sweet, and it’s where my Grace family lives.  It took me a long while into my year-long internship in this town to say that it ever felt like home, but now, even after I’ve been gone for almost exactly one calendar year, it still feels like going home.  
I arrived and promptly went to the home of my friend, C., to check in with him and his family which included a new addition of baby brother.  I drove up to the house, C. came running over, said, “Hi Lindsay!” and promptly ran past me and jumped into the driver seat of the car.  For the rest of my visit, that’s where he and his sister sat, pressing buttons, wearing my sunglasses and enjoying Sprocket.  It was fine by me because then I could hold the new baby, sweet as sweet can be.  I even got to feed him a bottle.  I think I want one some day.
From there, I picked up Mr. Organist and we went off to the Taste of Grace, an annual fundraiser supper at Grace.  I was wonderfully greeted and hugged by many congregation members.  [Others just kinda looked at me, realizing I was an anachronism.]  I loved it.  Harry, the member who consistently called me Sweet Pea, found me and used the nickname more than once.  [Only he can pull it off; I think I’d punch anyone else who tried such a name so get no ideas.]  I loved the catch-up conversations and the laughs.  I love the people of Grace.
I had a wonderful time with many former coworkers – a party that lasted until 2am and a lunch the next day thrown on top like the quintessential cherry.  It was the perfect night to sit outside and be like we used to be.  I think the staff agrees with me when I say we were tight-knit; I consider them great friends and I miss not being with them every day.  We talked about decorative grasses and extensively about oatmeal. [yeah. we’re that cool.]  The following day I had awesome conversation and lunch with Lori, the interim pastor I worked with upon first arriving in Dawson.  She has become a great mentor to me and it had been a year since we had seen each other – a year!  Certainly too long and not to be so long in the future, as plans will hopefully work to cross paths in Austin.
Now tonight, continuing the nomadic lifestyle that is my August, I stay in Stillwater with my Stillwater family.  Mark and Karen have welcomed me into their house so many times before; I even know where the spare key is.  [No, I will not tell you.]  It’s another place to me that feels like a home.  I feel comfortable, welcomed and always loved when I step inside these doors.  I feel known.  It’s a safe place of friends and great conversation.  
While my driver’s license currently reads with an Edgerton address as my permanent residence, that soon will change too.  Minnesota plates will be attached to Sprocket and my license will hold an Austin address.  A parsonage – to which I move in just over a week – will become yet another home to me.  The Edgerton home fits the dictionary definition; it is certainly a place that is a home and always will be.  But I think there’s more to home than the dictionary tells us.  It’s a place to feel loved, welcomed, and appreciated.  A place with friends and family, and a place you love to gather, to stay, and to visit.  Edgerton, Dawson, Mark and Karen’s house, and more to come – I’m blessed with many homes.  Incredibly blessed.

a portapotty post.

26 Jul
It’s an I’m-just-not-sure-what-to-do-with-myself kind of day.  
I went to target to purchase note cards to mail off, but moped around the store for easily 45 minutes before actually checking out.  Then stopped at a quilt shop to see if I could find a quilt cleanser for these babies.  [I stopped at this quilt store a few weeks ago, looking for fabric for my red stole.  The woman who I spoke with today remembered me and asked me how my ordination was.  For nice!]  
A two-coffees kind of day.  A little obsessive over facebook day.
A spray painting wooden roosters day.  [Speaking of roosters, I died laughing at this blog post.]
I went to the jewelry center at the mall.  Gal pal, Kim, and her husband, together with her parents, bought me a Pandora bracelet for my ordination.  I found out there is a gnome charm.  Done.  [The woman who helped me asked if I collected gnomes.  Um … I guess so!]

And then I came home to find this in our yard.  Classy.  [We’re hosting an auction this weekend.  I promise a portapotty in the yard is not normal.]

I’m baking a cake in an attempt to make these tonight, as per request of a friend throwing a baby shower.  Wish me luck.  Mine likely will look nothing like the picture.  [But mine also won’t cost $48/dozen!]

But first, I think I might take a nap.  Sleep has not been my friend these last couple nights.  [After I put a second coat of paint on the roosters, of course.]

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